My time with the Fertile Myrtle Journal is coming to an end. I am 9 month pregnant with three weeks to go until my scheduled c-section, which is Oct. 31st. We really had little choice at this point but to do the c-section because our stubborn little girl is breech and I think she basically has been for most of the my pregnancy except during the first ultrasound at 12 weeks.
We visited my OB on Thursday for the start of our weekly appointments and after confirming her position I basically had two options: I could opt for the turning process at week 37 or schedule the section at week 39. After gathering all the facts about turning her, Mike and I both decided not to go that route. She is a big baby and will only be bigger at 39 weeks so it seemed like the section was the best and safest option at this point.
You know what's interesting though? I didn't realize how many people have very serious opinions and convictions about vaginal vs. section birth or getting an epidural vs. natural birth etc. What's even more amazing is that everyone is absolutely positive that the route they chose is 100% the right way to go, which is actually great for them because hopefully in most cases, each woman has had the best birthing experience. What I've started to learn for me is that I really have absolutely no control over my life, my pregnancy, my daughter's birth, whether or not I'll end up breast feeding like I plan to etc etc etc. I can rest however, in knowing that the same God of the universe who conducts the cosmos is in control of the little life inside me. I can't say whether or not a section is the best option but I know I can't tell someone else whether they should or shouldn't have one. I really want to nurse my daughter but I know that it may happen that I can't and that doesn't make me a bad mom.
In the grand scheme of our life, there are just so many things that are outside of our control and sometimes those things are very frustrating but I know that I want to be constantly grateful for the small things that I get to experience everyday. There will likely not be too many posts left here and then I'll switch back to "According to Leah." I can't believe 9 months went by so fast!
I totally understand what you are feeling but to hell with everyone else. You and Mike are the only two people that matter in the decisions that happen for YOUR child. Do what you guys feel is the best and everyone else can worry about themselves. Good luck and I can't wait to meet your little girl!
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